A Little Calmer

IUI nurse Keri called at 4:30 after she’d talked to Dr. Silverberg about the 2nd beta.  She said that although the results not rising by 67% isn’t ideal, 286 is still an excellent 2nd beta .  She said to look at it as if I had had a regular first beta around 50-75 – in that case, a 286 is a strong 2nd beta.  Her theory is that probably more than one embryo initially implanted, and now only one is continuing to develop.

Thank you everyone for your encouragement.  I’ve never made it this far before.  You know, I never considered what it would be like after the BFP.  That’s what we all are aiming for, right?  Once you see that BFP it’s all a home run, right?  Think again, my sisters.  IF just finds new and creative ways to continue the torture.

 And thanks for the beta calculator links!  I actually had a rise of 58%, and if you calculate it out, I’m actually doubling every 72hrs, and some do double every three days instead of every two.   Dr. Silverberg wants to repeat the HCG on Thursday, so somehow, I’ve just gotta stay sane until then.

I’m praying God will bring back that peace I started all this with.  I felt like He was telling me it’s my time, He had heard and answered my prayers.  Now because it’s not going according to my plan, I’m losing my faith.  So I’m reclaiming that peace!  And His promise from Psalms, that “He makes the barren woman to be the happy mother of children.”  He still knows the desires of my heart, He’s still here with me.  I can make it through this.


20 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. katery
    Jul 05, 2010 @ 21:30:31

    i’ve got my fingers crossed for you 🙂


  2. Myndi
    Jul 05, 2010 @ 22:36:37

    You know, I hadn’t even thought about the whole “started as two, but ending as one” scenario, and that makes perfect sense! I’ll be holding out hope that Thursday brings great news!


  3. athena
    Jul 06, 2010 @ 06:23:07

    thinking about you!! i’m right here with you in the what-the-heck-do-we-do-after-bpf!!?! it’s very very weird territory!!


  4. Kari
    Jul 06, 2010 @ 07:44:15

    ((HUGS)) & sticky baby dust!!


  5. Amber
    Jul 06, 2010 @ 08:10:15

    I’m 33 weeks now and I continue to find new things to freak out about. This journey is never really “over” for us, it just leads us in new directions. (Pregnancy is a lot more fun though!) Hoping Thursday’s beta goes upward!


  6. Another Dreamer
    Jul 06, 2010 @ 10:56:45

    Keeping you in my thoughts and hoping for a nice rise on Thursday! Hang in there.


  7. lilly
    Jul 06, 2010 @ 11:13:25

    cant wait till thursday! sometimes the tests make it harder than it already is on us…!


  8. womb for improvement
    Jul 06, 2010 @ 16:21:17

    Keep going. Keep hoping.


  9. staceysthoughts
    Jul 06, 2010 @ 16:23:51

    I have clung to that very same Scripture during times like these. Praying that these next few days will pass quickly and peacefully until you hear what I hope will be excellent news! I’m pulling for you, sister.


  10. katery
    Jul 08, 2010 @ 07:02:59

    i will be checking on you all day today, what time is your beta?


  11. katery
    Jul 08, 2010 @ 17:06:49

    thinking of you, a little worried since you haven’t posted, i hope you’re ok.


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