Drugs in the Mail! (shhhh)

When Freedom Pharmacy called me to get the co-pay and finalize shipment of the meds, at the end of the call they casually noted, “Oh, someone will need to be home tomorrow between 8am and 3pm to sign for the package.”  Aack!  I already asked to leave work early last Tuesday for the sonogram, and I don’t wanna push it with the boss.  Light bulb goes on – I get packages of reagents and such in the lab from FedEx off and on all day.  No one will notice and extra delivery, right?  So arragements are made to deliver the package at my work.

Super lucky – FedEx arrives by 8:15 am – before any patients and only half of the staff have arrived – along with three other refrigerated deliveries for the lab.  No one notices a thing!  I’m a super-sneaky success!  But as I go to tuck the box in the closet, it comes to my attention that the box is covered in bright neon stickers demanding that the contents be refrigerated IMMEDIATELY ON ARRIVAL.  Crap!  Our lab fridge is a tiny dorm-room fridge and is stocked to the top with reagents and samples.  No room there.

Finally I break down and as our medical assistant, Derrick, if I can stash a little package in the fridge.  He sees the padded foil manila envelope in my hand and immediately recognizes it as drugs.  “They were delivered for me, they’re not chemo, I promise, and the envelope is sealed, I just need to stash it in a fridge.”  Our financial counselor overhears.  Crap, my secret is getting out!  They shrug, sure, find a spot in the fridge.  I then try to make the bag as small as possible.  Find that it’s impossible to crumple up a giant, padded foil bag.  I try to hide it in grocery bags.  The foil shines through.  Finally I tuck it behind a bunch of sodas and head back to work.

Cut to lunch time – I swing around the corner into the break room to find a gathering around the fridge.  There’s Derrick, holding my foil envelope and trying to explain to alarmed assembly that it’s just personal stuff, it’s not chemo tucked in next to their lunch boxes!  I finally give up and admit, it’s just fertility drugs, they’re not radioactive, it’s ok!  Everyone else sighs in relief, ’til we all notice Derrick has gone perfectly still and is holding the envelope by a corner as far away from his body as possible.  “You’re not going to get pregnant just ’cause you’re holding the envelope!”  I try to re-assure him.  That’s it, everyone cracks up, and I then become the running joke of the office for the rest of the day.  All day it’s, “You touched it, too – look out!  You’re probably knocked up already!” 

*sigh*  So much for super-sneaky-stealth.  My advice – risk the wrath of the boss.  Call in sick.  Stay home.  Really.


14 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Pie
    Jul 16, 2009 @ 08:48:50

    Oh no! That could be my worst nightmare! Wow, you handled it with such grace, I’m impressed. But I’m still shuddering at the thought of that happening at my work. Ugh!


  2. Katie
    Jul 16, 2009 @ 10:59:17

    OMG, what a hilarious story! I’m glad you were successful at getting your meds, despite all the teasing!!


  3. Kate
    Jul 16, 2009 @ 11:21:55

    Ha! The cat’s outta the bag, huh? Oh well, more people to support you in your efforts 🙂


    • iamstacey
      Jul 16, 2009 @ 14:47:06

      yeah, so much for discretion! At least I was at a really small office that I don’t work at every week … who am I kidding, I’m sure everyone knows now! Oh well!


  4. Michelle
    Jul 16, 2009 @ 13:16:47

    I am sorry about that. It really would have been ok for a little while not to have them refrigerated. Sometimes I have to carry them with me and they could not be refrigerated. My doc says that is perfectly fine. he said the refrigeration is more for being able to keep them for a long time. I know this probably would have been good info to know before hand. Sorry you had to go through all that but I am glad you got everything and you are moving along.


  5. Katie
    Jul 16, 2009 @ 13:43:15

    Well, that didn’t go as planned, did it? Bummer. But the good news is that you got it and get to take one more step forward!


  6. Kate
    Jul 16, 2009 @ 18:33:04

    LOL yeah, well at least it made for a hilarious story 😉 Jeezaloo, hope the jokes get old by tomorrow right?!


  7. Clare
    Jul 18, 2009 @ 06:25:35

    OMG! I can’t believe that happened to you! Yeah definitely stay at home next time, pull a sickie as we say! Oh well I guess the cat’s out the bag now… sorry about that but I really enjoyed reading it!!


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